The Second Born Curse

This week's article summary is The Curse of the Second Born Child is Real.

I have always been fascinated by birth order, and, as a first-born, I wonder how different I might be if I had older siblings. 

 The article below intrigued me because of its shocking statistics for second-born boys and how more often they end up in trouble in school and even in life.

To me, a significant difference in birth order is the rules and limits first borns often have versus their younger siblings. 

As a first born, I had my parents’ attention much more than my younger sister did. Every rite of passage I encountered was novel, exciting, and potentially anxiety-inducing for my parents. Going through adolescence, getting a driver’s license, going on a first date, playing varsity sports, getting a first job, etc. Applying to college for a first born is often a family affair; we took family trips to visit college campuses. 

Yet by the time my sister applied my parents had lost their enthusiasm for the college search process. Instead, they had moved on to newer interests in my life’s path: my first job, getting married, having kids.

As a first born, I not surprisingly felt that my parents were overly involved in my life; I envied the autonomy my sister had, free from my parents’ watchful eyes. My sister, on the other hand, always felt that my parents doted on me and my needs and ignored her.

The article shouldn’t make you worry that your second-born son is heading down the road to ruin, yet it should remind us as parents to provide an equal amount of love, care, and attention to all of our kids.

Joe

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 If you have a son who’s the youngest or middle child, you’re going to want to watch them like a hawk. Second-born sons are more likely to get suspended, become juvenile delinquents, and go to prison.

According to a new report, the “curse of the second-born child” might be true. The report scoured tons of data sets and found that second-born children (specifically sons) have a whopping 25% to 40% increased chance of getting in serious trouble at school or with the law when compared to the first-born in the same family.

Researchers have suggested for a while that first-borns do better in education, have higher IQs, and can earn higher wages, but this is one of the first major studies to point out that second-born children are in fact the troublemakers of the bunch. 

And this isn’t something exclusive to families here in the states. The family data sets, consisting of thousands of sets of brothers, come from both the U.S. and Europe. Now, this isn’t to say that every second-born son is going to be a handful, but the study suggests the risk is there. 

But why? What makes second-born sons so different from their older siblings? 

For one, the report hypothesizes parents of first-borns are more invested in their upbringing. By the time the second kid comes around, parents are simply less vigilant. It also has to do with the child’s role models, who are adults: “The firstborn has role models, who are adults. And the second, later-born children have role models who are slightly irrational 2-year-olds, i.e., their older siblings. Both the parental investments are different, and the sibling influences probably contribute to these differences we see in the labor market and what we find in delinquency. It’s just very difficult to separate those two things because they happen at the same time.”

It’s important to note, however, this research is painting a very broad picture. Not every family will encounter this phenomenon, and being a second-born son certainly doesn’t mean you will have a harder time in life. There are always exceptions to the rule. 

But for parents out there raising a second child, it couldn’t hurt to keep a watchful eye and stay on guard. It seems that treating them differently than your first-born will have an impact.